Session 11 Review

Well done all!

The Dale Carnegie Course is designed to develop in us the ability to lead a more intentional life. Ironically, it's difficult because it goes against our natural tendencies. Which means we have to constantly fight against our natures to act in a way that ultimately works better for everyone. It's a tall order. That's why the Human Relations Champion is a unique honor. Of course, it doesn't end here. The fight (with ourselves) is just beginning. You've all taken great strides toward that goal.

In Session 10B, we learned the power of connecting emotionally with others. As several pointed out, we aren't in this alone. Doesn't it seem odd that for all the things that make us unique - our talents, strengths, abilities - the things that come naturally to us - we think we're nothing special? Yet, for all the things common to the human condition, we assume we're alone. Truly understanding we're not alone can be key to a new level of self-confidence and a renewed belief in yourself and your abilities.

Session 10 Review

Well, how's it going? Are you getting your point of view heard more frequently? Ironically, one of the greatest challenges to our self-confidence is knowing we've been heard, and haven't been able to persuade. Understand, that's still going to happen. What matters is that when we are heard, we have a chance to change their minds. Otherwise, just like between countries, when people stop communicating, problems begin.

In Session 10B, it was interesting to note that the stresses in our lives, the worries we deal with regularly, we just handle them. To others, they are an inspiration. Just remember, how you deal with what's on your plate can inspire others to deal more effectively with what's on theirs.

In Session 12 (May 27th), we welcome guests. Be sure to invite those who've watched you make this transition and been part of your journey. Let them celebrate with us.

Session 9 Review

Amazing!

As we progress upward in our careers, the ability to change people's attitudes and behaviors becomes more and more critical. Last week, in Session 9A, we heard how we are taking action to make that happen without diminishing the enthusiasm of those around us.

Interestingly, as we see people advance, sometimes they become less flexible instead of more flexible. In 9B, our focus was on helping us break out of the rigidity that seems to happen to other leaders as their responsibilities increase. Paradoxically, greater flexibility enables our subordinates to approach us more openly (particularly those in a different generation) and give us the information we need to make better decisions in our businesses (and in our lives).

CONGRATULATIONS on taking a big step outside of your comfort zones. Of course, isn't that where the opportunities in our lives are?

Session 8 Review

My word, what a great session!

In the A part, we learned the power of focusing on the positive traits in others. Interestingly enough, we can learn a lot about people by what they do -- it provides insight into who they are. Occasionally, powerful insight. By being simple and direct, we can significantly impact the belief others have in themselves.

Part B was about a couple of different points. First, we often fail to "own" the compliments we receive from others. By including them in our own pep talks, we validate the strengths others have seen. And, we have to "own" the comments to be credible.

Secondly, animation can help to create enthusiasm when there is a lack of it. Is enthusiasm always loud? No, it isn't. The key: everyone expresses enthusiasm differently based upon (1) who they are and (2) the context.

Our own animation is one avenue (and one of the easiest avenues) for us to create enthusiasm where there was none. Make the decision; create your own enthusiasm; infect those around you with it. You'll have more fun and be more productive -- and so will they.

Session 5 Review

I am particulary impressed with the way all of you are supporting each other. As much as the coaches, Eric, and I would like to take credit for your success, you and your support of each other is at least as critical to your success and growth. Thank you for helping create an environment where we can risk without risk.

Let me see, in 5A, we started off with the "Box Factory" and it only got better from there. Animation in our presentations helps relieve stress (which it seems we all have in our lives). From there, we used animation to not only focus our stress, but become more entertaining and engaging communicators.

In session 5B, Unleash Your Full Potential, we saw people really step out of their box. While we may not LIVE outside of our box all the time, it's important to know we can GO there when the need arises -- particularly as we move into leadership. Key to motivating others is the ability to transfer our passion to our audience -- whether it's one or one thousand.

This is another step in gaining control of our own keyboard. Maybe it's only another octave or two, but it sure beats going through our lives only able to play chopsticks.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

Session 12 Preview - elaborating on vision

Well, we've climbed to the top of a mountain. What a great view! It's awesome. Take some time. Enjoy it. Then after a bit of time, ask yourself the question........

Now, what?

When we get to the top of a mountain, by all means, it's important to take time to enjoy the view and relish our success. But after the celebration, the next step, and an important one, is deciding which mountain do I choose to climb next? And, what will the view look like from the top of that mountain? This is more than goal-setting.

For twelve weeks in the Dale Carnegie Course, we work on developing the ability to paint pictures in the minds of our listeners. Starting in an incident, we help our audience form a picture in their minds that matches the picture in ours.

This is basically the same. Imagine you are the speaker, describing an incident to you, the audience. It's merely a moment in time – that just hasn’t happened, yet. Your job is to paint the picture of what you want for yourself.

• What are you doing?
• What are you seeing?
• What are you saying?
• What are you hearing?
• What are you smelling?
• What are you sensing?

This is not difficult despite how others have made it sound.

• What do you daydream about? (Or, what do you worry about? Then, imagine what the opposite would look like.)
• When you think about what you want your life to look like, what excites you?
• To where does your mind wander when not thinking about a specific problem? Let your imagination run wild and dream.

It's vital to create a clear and compelling vision of our future. Without it, we'll lose interest. When it gets hard, we'll give up. So, how do we know it's compelling? You'll know what's compelling to you when:

• You think about it automatically when you wake up in the middle of the night;
• It's exciting enough to cause you to change;
• It's exciting enough for you to want to get better;
• It's exciting enough for you to to work harder and it doesn't seem harder;
• It's exciting enough for you to want to be more effective.

A compelling vision fuels the changes we need to make.

Maybe, the long-term goal, the long-term vision, is way off in the future. As you pursue it, what would your life look like three to six months down the road toward it?

Determining and deciding on your vision may be one of the most important things you ever do. Most people don't decide to go anywhere in life, so they never get anywhere in life.

According to insurance statistics, of 100 individuals beginning at age 25, by age 65, 95% will be dead, or dead broke. Only the top 5% will be successful.

95% of people never write down their goals; 5% do. Coincidence? I don't think so.

MY WAGE

• I bargained with Life for a penny,
• And Life would pay no more;
• However I begged at evening
• When I counted my scanty store;

• For Life is a just employer,
• He gives you what you ask,
• But once you have set the wages,
• Why, you must bear the task.

• I worked for a menial's hire,
• Only to learn, dismayed,
• That any wage I had asked of Life,
• Life would have gladly paid.

--J.B. Rittenhouse

Decide what you want, write it down, and go for it.

Success will come. (Just remember: opportunity is often missed because it arrives dressed in work clothes.)

Session 12 Preview

Session 12: Celebrate Achievements and Renew Our Vision

Wow. We've come a long way. Now it's time to reflect on (and celebrate) what's happened.

• When we walked through the door, we had an idea of what we expected from the Dale Carnegie Course.
• By living intentionally, committing and following through, we've had breakthroughs and successes. We’ve reported on those successes. What one incident (reported on or not) has been most meaningful for you?
• Now that we've achieved all, or part, of our initial vision - What next?

That's pretty much the format of our final presentation:

• 20 seconds what I expected
• 2 minutes my major breakthrough (magic formula), and
• 40 seconds to paint the picture of "What next?"

I've got another post where I elaborate a little on the vision. If you're interested, click here.

Otherwise, see you next session.